Well folks....sorry I have been MIA from the blog for the past two days...Let me get you caught up...
So Saturday like I said I was trying to upload things and could not so that is why I didn't do that. I did get both my cardio times in on Saturday and cleaned my car.... you will have to see the video to come. On Sunday, (yesterday), I was going to upload all the stuff again but came home to my mom having some issues. She had been having shortness of breath and very VERY high blood pressure readings. She suffers from high BP anyway, takes 4 BP meds, and is overweight as well. Well we took her to the emergency room where her BP was like 200/100 - something. Crazy right? They did all kinds of tests to make sure her heart was ok. It seemed alright but still needed to get the BP down. So they gave her a diuretic and anyway we ended up being there until almost 10 at night. In the middle of the night she had some muscle cramps in her legs and it was just a crazy stressful day. Thankfully, by God's grace, she is doing ok. She went to the cardiologist today and he is going to do some further tests on her. Please pray for her...Diane. And it was hard to go to that emergency room yesterday ---- where only 3 months ago my dad was brought to and he passed away. It was especially hard on my mom. I think I tried to ignore it.
Today I went and worked out with Tom. And then I went and weighed in. And I gained a pound. ...sigh. I have been fighting this all day. I mean I am on my period (which I haven't had in 4 months) and that could account for the gain. Who knows? I mean... I kid you not that I have been working hard....working hard on my eating....drinking water...just everything I can do. And I am dealing with such emotion concerning this. I know that it is yet again a challenge from God to push through. I have had some excellent encouragement from some friends today reminding me about the bigger picture that matters....and that is glorifying God in all I do. Whether a gain or a loss....whether a perceived success or failure....whether I feel good or I feel like crap.....no matter what... I MUST GLORIFY the GIVER of my strength and the Giver of the grace that I receive to even be able to run this race. IT is HARD to always remember this. IT is a BATTLE!!!! I feel parts of me breaking as I journey down this road. Like parts of my ridiculous thinking being crushed .....to pieces..... by God's grace, to change me into what He wants me to be through all of this. ALL MY LIFE....... I have wanted to be thin or normal. ALL MY LIFE....I have dreamed of success..... and the Lord is showing me that I must let go to want more than anything......................His will in my life. Period. And it's hard to let go, but beyond this dream of being fit or being able to do this or that or where this outfit or ...whatever! is this shout that has been screaming through out eternity and seems to be whispering LOUDLY in my ears....."There is so much more than that" "He is what matters most" "This life is but a moment...the life to come ....forever" And so ....with that. I push on. Do I still want to lose weight and be active? To wear smaller sizes and be able to move with better ease? To improve my health and take care of my body? ABSOLUTELY!! But I realize..it is in the way I encounter every struggle and success along the way and what I make of them that matter most.
I think that as the Lord trims the spiritually "fat" person inside of me and makes that girl healthier in Him..... that my butt and thighs will follow right along with it.
Yep. Day one. Week three. This is where I'm at.
6 comments:
ONE DAY AT A TIME.....
That's all you can do....
take it ONE DAY AT AT TIME. Don't worry about yesterday or tomorrow or next week.....just TODAY.
That is MY biggest struggle and something I am working on this week. ONE DAY AT A TIME.
If you typically GAIN when you have your period, you may be shocked with a decent loss next week. Don't stress it. Just live for TODAY. Enjoy TODAY. Love TODAY. The rest will come.
And for the record, I am SO glad you're back. I really missed you! And OF COURSE I will pray for your mom. My mom is Diane too!
((hugs))
Jeanne
I love you Sarah. Good post, my friend. It's amazing to see God at work in your life and it encourages me. It really does.
About the 1 pound weight gain. Yeah, the period thing. That little bugger. And also, maybe Tom can correct me if I'm wrong, but, after two weeks of faithful working out on your part, wouldn't you be building muscle? And wouldn't that muscle be weighing more than fat? Is that right Tom? You can ask him for me. If your clothes are fitting more loosely on your body, then that's the truer test of "success" in terms of losing weight, aka body fat. I'm not the expert of course but that's what I have thought to be true. I'm sure it's disappointing to look at the scale and not see a loss, but I bet most likely you HAVE "lost" in terms of body fat which is what you ultimately want to lose. Fuhged about dat scale.
Love ya. Keep it up. Have a great day tomorrow! :-)
Sarah, in my journey I've learned a lot about then and now. Having lost a huge amount of weight one way and keeping it off for 10 years only to regain it was horrific but then again it was a great learning experience. You know what? When I was NOT dieting, a one pound gain never entered my mind because my feet never met the scale. Before I began this journey I took a long hard look at where I would fall on my past attempts. 2 weeks was it for me. I'd get those 2 weeks in perfectly and then I'd get frustrated by the scale or bored or freaked at the thought of how long it would take and BOOM. Sooooo, this time, I didnt weigh at all, just meassured and counted DAYS that I lived my journey the way I had charted it out. It helped me a great deal. When I finally weighed in the first time I saw a HUGE loss! I keep putting the days in "my bank" and before I knew it a YEAR had gone by and off was 135lbs. I never looked ahead, like Jeanne said, I just focused on the now. It really worked for me.
I know how difficult this time has been for you with your Mom getting sick. In a different place and time that kinda stuff took me right to my old friend "food" Believe in your strength and power and keep your head up. You have so much invested in this and you're gonna work this out. I will keep your Mom and you in my prayers. Love yourself today, Sarah, you're sooo worth it :)
big hugs,
Maggie
I know it can be frustrating to not see what you hope on the scale. But you have worked so hard with the workouts and diet that the scale will catch up. Wait until after "Aunt Flo" leaves. I bet you'll be pleasantly surprised. But what matters most is that you continue with your journey. Do not let this get you discouraged. After 2 weeks I bet you have other "non-scale victories" such as more stamina, clothes feeling better, improved self-esteem. Those all count too. Just take it one day at a time.
I hope your mom is feeling better. I can only imagine how stressful it was for both of you to be in the hospital all day.
Hugs,
Diana
My Beautiful Sarah (I LOVE that photo)...
I know how scared you are about your mom. I am SO glad that your family will be with you guys over Easter. That will really help her spirits. As always, she will be in my prayers. You know how much I love your mom and how much she means to me. I know she is/was scared and I know you are too.
PLEASE TRY not to let the emotions of all this set you back though Sarah. It's easy to let those emotions roller coaster into OTHER emotions and then that roller coaster will speed into oblivion and we know where that goes. DON'T LET IT GO THERE SARAH!!!!
Not only that, but you are dealing with emotions relating to your period and a bad weigh in and the pressure from this journey and you just need to RELEASE IT ALL INTO THE UNIVERSE AND LET IT GO and TAKE SOME DEEP BREATHS and understand what I was telling you on the phone....that you ARE building muscle...that on the Biggest Loser, Jillian has ALWAYS said that the second weigh in is NOTORIOUS for bad weigh-ins because of that.
Remember what I said...Tom is building you a super sonic muscle burning furnace inside of you right now with all that weight training he is making you do and that muscle weighs more than fat and RIGHT NOW the results on the scale may not show up the way you want it, but later on, those muscles will be burning so much more fat than if you were doing it slower. TOM knows what he is doing. He is building you a FURNACE that will be THE MOST EFFICIANT for you...and in the weeks to come, YOU WILL BE THANKING HIM!!! Because you will be burning so many calories and so much fat that you will just be dropping the pounds.
Of course a period after none for 4 months doesn't help either!! LOL. Just take a breath Sarah...and relax! Things are progressing....you said you feel GOOD. THAT in itself is a true testiment to what you are doing. THAT is a BLESSING...
Now rock on with your bad self and just keep picturing that super sonic muscle burning furnace being built inside of you right this very second!!!
Loving you!
Jen
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HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO US!!
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